Book Review: Girls Gone Wise in a World Gone Wild

The book Girls Gone Wise in a World Gone Wild is by author Mary A. Kassian. Mary is an internationally world renowned speaker and holds a position of professor at a Southern Baptist Seminary. According to her website she graduated from the faculty of Rehabilitation Medicine from the University of Alberta, Canada and has studied systematic theology at the doctoral level. She is also married to a professional football team Chaplain and has 3 grown boys.


I was shopping around to buy books months ago that would enhance my knowledge and heighten my skills as a youth leader at my local church. When I came across this particular book, I was excited to buy this book and read it because it seemed like it would better equip me with the awareness I needed to aid young girls to walk into the Light of Jesus instead of heading down into the path of destruction.


First, I must tell you it did take me much longer than I expected to read, understand, and grasp the concepts portrayed in this book. Initially, I had the view point that since the age group targeted was more than likely high school and younger, I would solely only take in the information given, trying to find ways to help others apply it in their lives. This was my first big mistake. Kassian was quick to remind me, " Although external appearance and sexual behavior certainly play a part in determining if a particular woman has or hasn't gone wild, the Bible teaches that there's a whole lot more involved than that. What's more, it teaches that Girl-Gone-Wild behavior isn’t restricted to young single women. A woman can be a Girl-Gone-Wild at any stage of life...There is a measure of Girl-Gone-Wildness in all of us." (pg 10-11) So, as days turned into weeks, I found myself being convicted of many key points outlined throughout the chapters that I was personally struggling with in my own life. It soon became clear to me that although this would be a great book to possibly use as an all girl group lesson guide, I needed to take a step down from my "leader" post and settle into a seat of humility in order to be moved and changed by all that the author had to offer for me. Once I did this it was amazing how quickly the Word of God began to change parts of my life I was fighting to hold onto. Parts of my life, that to be honest, I didn't even know were really a problem at all.


Kassian starts off this book by getting straight to business. I like that in a person, no sugary coating, just tell it like it is, but of course in a loving way. I believe that she does this with charm and wit involved throughout. What is the "wild thing" and what makes her so attractive to young girls in our society? That is the big question being tackled in the introduction. She quickly takes the reader through a run down of all the popular "wild things" during each generation of American culture explaining how more boundaries were crossed, clothing & hair styles reflecting her "wildness", and the ever increasing sexual exploits with each era.


She is thorough and complete in defining what wild means and where wild came from. Like the first Girl-Gone-Wild, our Mother Eve fell into the temptations of thinking she had the right to make decisions without trusting or obeying God. This was Eve's first mistake. She decided to live by own merits and rules without looking to the Lord for guidelines and just taking Him at His word. As daughters of Eve, we too "are born with Girl-Gone-Wild tendencies and most experience bitterness, pain, and even death in our relationships."


Kassian then goes on to explain that her idea for this book was inspired from the scripture passages in Proverbs 5:1, 5-6; 7:6-27 which is about the adulterous woman. We don't know if we are a Girl-Gone-Wild and she has a fool proof outline for checking yourself against God's Word. The book outlines 20 different points of contrast between the Girl-Gone-Wild (adulterous woman of Proverbs 7) and how to become a Girl-Gone-Wise by applying other scriptures from both the New and Old Testaments to your daily life. Here are the 20 points:

• Heart: What Holds First Place in Her Affections
• Counsel: Where She Gets Her Instruction
• Approach: Who Directs Her Love Story
• Attitude: Her Prevailing Disposition
• Habits: Her Priorities and Routines
• Focus: What Commands Her Attention
• Appearance: How She Adorns Herself
• Body language: Her Nonverbal Behavior
• Roles: Her Pattern of Interaction
• Sexual conduct: Her Sexual Behavior
• Boundaries: Her Hedges and Precautions
• Authenticity: Her Public Versus Private Persona
• Neediness: Whom She Depends on to Fulfill Her Longings
• Possessions: How She Handles Her Money and Resources
• Entitlement: Her Insistence on Gratification
• Reliability: Her Faithfulness to Commitments
• Speech: Her Speech Habits
• Influence: Her Impact on Others and Their Impact on Her
• Sustainability: Her Ability to Nurture and Sustain a Relationship
• Teachability: Her Willingness to Be Corrected and Instructed
  

The first chapter begins with the lesson regarding the female heart. With this we read Proverbs 5:5-6, "Her feet go down to death; her steps follow the path to Sheol; she does not ponder the path of life; her ways wander, and she does not know it."  The author makes a clear connection for us about how woman's feet and their hearts are intertwined. Kassian states "the idiom "swept her off her feet indicates that there is a strong connection between a girl's heart and her feet." (pg 24) So, this is the first "contrast" she makes between the Girl-Gone-Wild and the Girl-Gone-Wise. "A wise woman gives the Lord Jesus Christ first place in her heart. Her feet follow the inclination of her heart, so she makes cautious, wise, godly decisions about her relationships with men."(pg 24) She goes on to say that "A wild woman, on the other hand, does not have Christ at the center of her affections...Her relationship to Christ is peripheral, shoved off to the side somewhere." (pg 24)


But as you continue reading, Kassian asserts that defining the difference between the two is never cut and dry. She reminds the reader that "although her steps wander, the Wild Thing of Proverbs is a very religious woman who moves in religious circles. Nowadays, you might find her at a youth group, on the worship team, in a Bible study, on a mission trip, or teaching Sunday school. She could be the leader of the women's ministry in your church. Or the speaker at your next women's retreat. She could be me. She could be you. On the surface, the Wild Thing does a lot of things right...She lives a religious life, but does not love Jesus wholeheartedly." 

 I must say that as the chapters progressed this is pretty much the way each one went along. I had to sit down and force myself to take the time to check and recheck myself as I read. I was looking up whole passages to make she Kassian was aligned in what she wrote about and was impressed each time by her use of scripture. The truths of the Gospel of Christ were jam packed into the pages of this book from beginning to end and not in a tight neat package. She consistently explains everything with details and with great use of examples to aid the reader in understanding God's word and how it is important to their life today. There were days I knew I needed to repent due to the oftentimes gentle but occasionally harsh feelings of conviction that flooded my heart.

 Kassian's book is meant for any woman at any age who is looking to help get their heart right with God. She writes, "Girls-Gone-Wise cry out, as David did, "O Lord, teach me how you want me to live! Then I will obey your commands. Make me wholeheartedly committed to you!" (Psalm 86:11NET)" This is a book to change your heart and your life. She even goes so far as to offer application questions for free on her website for you to answer after finishing each chapter's reading. I highly recommend this book.